In the last few days, everything regarding The Videogame Journal felt shaky: my mind went back to how well we were doing with gacha games, and how cool it would've been to keep riding the wave.
Each time I went back, though, I felt like something was still off: I really want to get to greater heights in this voyage, but I want to do this with you, while we do what we love and we keep our freedom. Gacha games weren't ringing the last bell.
Freezing Fear of the Future
I talked about this with my family, and we all agreed there was no way pushing in this direction would've brought anything good... to anyone of us. I decided to move all my channel history to "unlisted", and to remove articles about gacha from this website too: I don't want to keep doors that brought me right into the pit of darkness to anyone that shares a journey with me.
While thinking all of this, my eye caught a random Cardfight: Vanguard card that was lying on my desk at random. It was a promo card I received a good while back. It was sitting there for no reason.
"Harmonics Messiah": nothing special, really, I don't think this card is played, it's basically a vanilla. And yet, what caught my attention was the card flavor text: "Shine through the darkness of confusion, great light of truth-!"
That reminded me the reason why I got into this card game in particular: the feeling that my deck was really about me. About my story. The idea that cards were speaking to me. That's how I wanted my videogame adventure to feel like.
And instead, so far, it all has been about "saving money to handle this new character / weapon / character dupes". To feel more "complete". To stop feeling I was missing out on something.
And yet, wasn't I looking for anything else? My first feeling was: go back to the website, and write: this will make you happy. I like to think that games are about people: that they exist to help people express themselves better, and better communicate with others.
I don't want to keep doors that brought me right into the pit of darkness to anyone that shares a journey with me.
Were there games that could help me doing that? From that question, things started to line up. I bumped into my article about Coromon, and realized that... I love making videos. Talking about games. What was driving me insane was the fear doing it without focusing on gacha games would've been too much for me. That it would've never been as effective, and that I don't know enough.
After all, though, I'm here to tell a story, not perform on a stage. My dream is to share a story with you all. To listen to your own stories about the games we all play. And sticking with gacha would've never helped getting close to this dreams - even with 5k views videos about popular topics.
A single conversation could mean much more than one billion views over a popular content that doesn't hold a message I'd like to spread. This is what I learned from life, and games that changed my life.
From there, the walk was downhill: like a dam breaking, ideas started to come back, my fear slowly vanishing under the warm sun of hope.
"Shine through the darkness of confusion, great light of truth-!"
New Horizons
With Artache, I want to bring game making in the hands of everyone. It's a project I hold dear, but never had the time to work on - mostly because of live service games keeping my attention away from it. I realized that could've been a starting point.
I decided to bring you RPGs that helped me shape the idea for the entire project:
Pokémon accompanied me since I was a little kid: that could've been the foundation
Final Fantasy kept me company during hard times: I want to investigate its history better than I ever did
Fire Emblem sparked my love for characters and the relation we establish with them in games, that lately made me go towards gacha: I want to go back to the origins.
Alongside this, two other genres shaped my present:
Trading Card Games were the board game I loved to share with my dearest friends. They are still something that, if handled with care, can be something I can share with you without being entangled by the gacha aspect of it. And, on top of that, physical tcgs still leave you with ownership over the product - something you can't say for live service game's characters, for sure.
Rhythm Games - oh, this is even more deep. Rhythm Games made me experience something really special in the past, that I hold the most dear. Then, I started playing them competitively, and that feeling slipped off my hands. Competitive in Rhythm Games just kept me away from creating friendships, and actually broke some. Therefore, I now know what to bring to you. Which experiences to look forward to from these games
Exploring new games: the journey should never end with a set of games that never change. It's something live service games make you feel, because it's really hard to follow more than three at once - even two may be hard. Now that I'm free from their grip, I can experience any game, and, if I find it fun, share it with you in videos, lives and articles.
I'm here to tell a story, not perform on a stage. My dream is to share a story with you all. To listen to your own stories about the games we all play.
And so, here we are! I reworked the Games pages, to reflect all those decisions.
As soon as I did, I felt finally free, and happy again. I really look forward to share this voyage with you all, and to create something much more special than many views on a video.
Together.
PS: I have Cardfight Vanguard's first season english ending, I'll leave you with this ;P